I m rereading and updating diary-like entries on this blog, from the past two years. I call it “from the vault”. I’m collecting the entries for a LS Harteveld book called Big (diaries and erotica), about my affair with a man “called” Mister Big.
Today’s episode is a true inspiration… wow! I m currently working, literally like the devil is at my heels. I launched a White Tigress Facebook page and started posting what will become my life’s work on the White Tigress. I started a new Dutch blog at a steady rate of 8 posts a week, and I opened my first (and THE first!) course for aspiring White Tigress women.
Part of me thought I was overdoing, and should stop. But rereading this post made me realize;
It is a truly blessed way of living.
Until this morning I was determined to keep this light, You are healing. My first impulse had been to share inspiring examples of people dealing with disease and death, and who in the face of death had kicked some serious butt! They had found their way to immortality through creating, and working, and expressing themselves fully. They had not healed their body, but from the looks of it did look like they healed their spirit.
But then I thought: Hey! What’s that about, Miss Beenackers?
Since when did start sharing stories about people who didn’t heal?
You, my love, are going to write a light care-free blog post on Monday. About people who did heal. And you’re going to spread hope and light and joy.
And then I got up and the first thing on the news:
David Bowie died.
So this post is not about healing. It’s not about how every morning you can say to your body:
“Thank you for my healing”
although I do recommend this, regardless of your physical condition.
It’s not about positive thinking and how so many aspects of your suffering are in your head.
A flat tire can only give you a headache if it bounces off the wheel, into a tree, and then hits you in the head. But your thoughts about a flat tire, those can give you a headache.
The reason we suffer so much from being sick is not just the physical aspect- it’s the mental one. It’s the fear, and the insecurity, and the unwillingness to deal with death. But (with the right help) you can learn to control your mental suffering.
But this post is not about that.
This post is about David Bowie.
This post is about Keith Haring.
This post is about Picasso, and the yogis Indira Devi, and BKS Iyengar and Pattabhi Jois.
This post is about knowing you will die, either because you are really sick or because you re really old, and your answer is:
Keep following that passion, and walk right through the fire. Run through it!
The people I mentioned are famous examples, but don’t make the mistake to think it is their fame that made them successful at creating their own path. We had our own female Picasso in the family, and although she isn’t that famous, she pushed back. She worked. She painted. She transformed herself and will always be remembered for being an artist, for being a mother, for being a sister, an aunt, but most of all for being herself.
You Are Healing or I Am Healing is a positive thought that will make you more resilient when you need to deal with illness. But if you can find a way to act, to express, to love, to live, and keep moving, to keep creating, to keep transforming, then you will feel better regardless.
Then you can say:
I may or I may not heal.
But that will not stop me.
David Bowie released his last album two days before he died.
From the vault (update 2017)
“From the vaults” will be posted on both M Yoga and LS Harteveld.
Yoga in 2016
Yoga video You Are Healing
I made an 18 minute home yoga video for You Are Healing. It is a sweet and moving yoga practice.
You can find it here
Baby M #15 You Are Healing
The music in class for You Are Healing should be from David Bowie!
David Bowie Yoga Playlist
Since there was no way getting this on a cd in time, I signed up for Spotify premium and bought a sound blaster to connect to Spotify on my phone with Bluetooth.
Rebel on yogis!